The future

In my generation no one seems to know what they want to do with their lives anymore. I don't know why... I would want to know what I want to do when I'm out of high school, out of my parents' house. Then again, a lot of people believe that their parents will support them. My parents are going to support me, don't get me wrong. But they're not going to hand things over to me. How they're going to support me is let me stay home for a little longer. Reason being I'm not good at math... AT ALL. I can't do house payments, I don't know how to count out a budget. It's bad, I know. But math was and still isn't, my best subject. So my parents told me that they're going to let me stay home when I'm not at college and teach me how to do house payments and help me set up a budget. Even when I'm moved out and ready to be independent they'll be there for me. But with other kids in my school, even kids older than me, they expect their parents to pay for their house, food, whatever. They expect they won't have to go to college to get a career because their life is handed to them on a silver platter.

How I want my future to go is I'll graduate high school, and go to college to become a child welfare social worker, a child life specialist, or a journalist. I want to be successful in life one way or another. I want to hopefully show people who maybe like me, they have a "disability" (how I look at hearing impairment or any "disability" is more like a unique trait that people have to stand out), that they're able to exceed expectations too. Whether it's being like me, with hearing impairment and overcoming odds whether it being not being able to talk, or being deaf, or whatever the case is for them. Or like one of my best friends, Sarah*, who's legally blind. She doesn't let any of it stop her and she has exceeded odds also. Whatever the case is I want people to be able to look at me or anybody who's overcome their "disability" and realize that just because a doctor says they won't be able to walk, or see, or speak, or whatever their case is... Doesn't mean it's true!

That, is how I want my future to be like, of course I'm not in control of what happens, God is, but I hope that my future is bright. But when I say what I want to do with my life in school... People laugh, or they say my parents are forcing me to be successful. But that's not true. Whilst my parents don't want me out on the streets with no success in life... They're not going to force me to be something I'm not.

This is honestly sad though, how these days people my own age believe that just because I know that things are not going to be handed to me that I'm being forced to go to college, that I'm being forced to have a successful career, that my parents are forcing me to be independent. It's sad that they're in denial and believing that their parents are just going to hand them things in life... It's all kind of pathetic in a way really.

That's all for now.

Olivia



* Sarah is not my friend's real name I'm simply using a fake name due to privacy. :)

Optimism in bullying

My name is Olivia. I'm 15 years old and I'm a freshman in high school. I decided to create this blog as a way for people to either somehow manage to find optimism in what I post, or for myself to find optimism. I don't know which yet. :)

I guess that's my little intro. Now I want to blog about something that's on my heart lately.


I have been bullied since 3rd grade, I'm hearing impaired and 3rd grade was the time people have began to realize that I'm"different". In 3rd grade, I decided to stop wearing my hearing aid so I could start to feel "normal". BIGGEST. MISTAKE. OF. MY. LIFE. I don't know why I thought I'd be "normal" just for not wearing my hearing aid. But as the days moved on I started hearing more and more comments and sneers on how loud I spoke, on how "weird" I talk, how teachers needed to repeat things 5 times before I could hear them. It's was horrid, but I pushed through it... Then in 4th grade was the year I started to realize that this whole "not wearing my hearing aid" thing wasn't going to work out. So I slowly begun to wear it again. I felt happier because I thought the bullying would stop... But no. It didn't, mostly because I need to have hearing aid batteries with me at all times in case my hearing aid dies. It was one day where I took out a pack of hearing aid batteries that a girl walks by, takes the batteries out of my hand, and throws them away. That day I learned that it will be tough... To fast forward to 5th grade, that was the year I finally realized that this wasn't going to stop. I was bullied verbally and even a little physically. I got in trouble for defending myself and standing up for myself. I was then moved to homeschool after my mom didn't want me to be bullied like I was anymore. It only got worst in homeschool. I was cyberbullied relentlessly and finally... In 8th grade. I kind of had peace. I went to a charter school and the bullying was minimal.


Here I am in 9th grade today... Going to a public high school and it's happening again. But not as often... One girl gave out my phone number to a butch of people and acted like she was the guy I like... Another group of girls call me retard in the halls. But, this is high school and people won't be accepting of you. Especially if you're different. All I can do is remain optimistic and remember that this is life... And that people will hurt you. It's been 6 years and it's time to forget the past, forget the idiots I'm dealing with now, and focus on the future!

I am in no way shape or form asking for pity from sharing this story... I want other people to think of my story as a reminder to be strong and to remind optimistic no matter what life throws at you.


Well that's all for now....


Olivia